The New Republican Candidates Names (as thought up in Economics)
Rudolph Guiliani - Rudy Ewwliani or Rudy Jewliani (hes not a jew tho)
John McCain - John McPain
Mitt Romney - Shitt Romney
Mike Huckabee - Mike Suckabee or Mike Fuckabee
Sam Brownback - Sam Bareback
Fred Thompson - (I couldn't think of one so its still fred thompson, but lowercase so its more insulting.)
Uhhh
I know none of these are particularly witty, but Economics is pretty boring.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
It's raining on my keyboard.
I'm sitting and trying to justify why I'm still mad. If I'm so mad, why is it 11.30 and I'm up trying to get him to go to sleep? If I'm so mad, then why do I care whether or not he's okay? The radio is playing the 3rd Green Day song in the past hour, and it doesn't help when I'm trying to just forget about him for a while.
The rain can't be good for the keyboard, but somehow it feels better letting it go.
I'm sitting and trying to justify why I'm still mad. If I'm so mad, why is it 11.30 and I'm up trying to get him to go to sleep? If I'm so mad, then why do I care whether or not he's okay? The radio is playing the 3rd Green Day song in the past hour, and it doesn't help when I'm trying to just forget about him for a while.
The rain can't be good for the keyboard, but somehow it feels better letting it go.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Gross.
I was making myself a salad, and for kicks I started reading the ingredients on the back of the ranch dressing bottle. I was a litlle shocked (and somewhat disgusted) to find that it had not one, but two of the same chemicals in my hair stuff that I used this morning (which I also read for kicks). Oh well. A little ranch in my hair, and a little hair stuff in my salad. Who can tell the difference?
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Moments
A List Of Moments and things I would kill for:
1. The smell of car exhaust (in small dosages)
2. Guitar Picks
3. Casey Lee
4. Plant Bamboo
5. Things made of bamboo. (Like potscrapers from Whole Foods)
6. Whole foods
7. Fake Problems
8. Sean, Chris and Derek
9. Waking up at 530 and realizing that we're going to be in trouble if jacob doesnt get up and go to another room, which makes me realize he was there the whole time
10. Against Me!
11. Asian Mexican place
12. Roller Coasters
13. Glow sticks
14. Congar
15. The number 13
16. the number 17
17. the number 87
18. time magazine's verbatim
19. venice beach
20. black and white things
21. old songs that remind us of our past (ex: Lets get this party started - pink)
22. Ridiculous sad songs: (ex: Graduation - Vitamin C?)
23. tofu
24. My one and only freshman sidekick
25. love your body day
26. grape nuts
27. Mr Pibb
28. brains
29. my middle finger
30. crepes
31. email
32. the beach market
33. eiffel tower
34. synthesizers
35. techno
36. The Eco Cafe
37. Stars antique market
38. Control - Alt - Delete
39. stilts
40. birth control
41. Stars (not celebrities)
42. rain
43. Dr. Pepper
44. RMX's
45. Tuarana's
46. Ige
47. Acting on impulses
48. buying tampons
49. Relieved because Naked understands my need to get naked
50. arguing about soymilk
51. watching the korean channel
52. actually getting into the soap operas on the korean channel and discussing them with jacob
53. shooting keller in the head
54. watching records spin round and round and round and round.....
55. CONGAR
56. dinosaurs
57. sitting and realizing how amazing all this technology crap is
58. the smell of christmas trees
59. Booboo
60. Working so hard that sweat actually rolls
61. Moshing
62. hightops
63. Jackson and MiniCon
64. Staying up and thinking "oh i should go to bed" and then staying up another couple of hours
65. wondering what people are doing when theyre not around me
66. being afraid and overloaded by too much to look at and being led where im supposed to go
67. being young
68. mexican cokes with awesome people
69. dreams of having a soymilk empire!
70. dreams in general
71. hiding and not being found
72. being held
73. sex
74. lemons and lemon things
75. bass drums and bass guitars
76. The Way I Are
77. getting rear ended when its not my car or my fault
78. legoland
79. making jokes about manhattan beach bitches and their credit cards
80. sitting with him and saying nothing and thinking about everything we could do, if only...
1. The smell of car exhaust (in small dosages)
2. Guitar Picks
3. Casey Lee
4. Plant Bamboo
5. Things made of bamboo. (Like potscrapers from Whole Foods)
6. Whole foods
7. Fake Problems
8. Sean, Chris and Derek
9. Waking up at 530 and realizing that we're going to be in trouble if jacob doesnt get up and go to another room, which makes me realize he was there the whole time
10. Against Me!
11. Asian Mexican place
12. Roller Coasters
13. Glow sticks
14. Congar
15. The number 13
16. the number 17
17. the number 87
18. time magazine's verbatim
19. venice beach
20. black and white things
21. old songs that remind us of our past (ex: Lets get this party started - pink)
22. Ridiculous sad songs: (ex: Graduation - Vitamin C?)
23. tofu
24. My one and only freshman sidekick
25. love your body day
26. grape nuts
27. Mr Pibb
28. brains
29. my middle finger
30. crepes
31. email
32. the beach market
33. eiffel tower
34. synthesizers
35. techno
36. The Eco Cafe
37. Stars antique market
38. Control - Alt - Delete
39. stilts
40. birth control
41. Stars (not celebrities)
42. rain
43. Dr. Pepper
44. RMX's
45. Tuarana's
46. Ige
47. Acting on impulses
48. buying tampons
49. Relieved because Naked understands my need to get naked
50. arguing about soymilk
51. watching the korean channel
52. actually getting into the soap operas on the korean channel and discussing them with jacob
53. shooting keller in the head
54. watching records spin round and round and round and round.....
55. CONGAR
56. dinosaurs
57. sitting and realizing how amazing all this technology crap is
58. the smell of christmas trees
59. Booboo
60. Working so hard that sweat actually rolls
61. Moshing
62. hightops
63. Jackson and MiniCon
64. Staying up and thinking "oh i should go to bed" and then staying up another couple of hours
65. wondering what people are doing when theyre not around me
66. being afraid and overloaded by too much to look at and being led where im supposed to go
67. being young
68. mexican cokes with awesome people
69. dreams of having a soymilk empire!
70. dreams in general
71. hiding and not being found
72. being held
73. sex
74. lemons and lemon things
75. bass drums and bass guitars
76. The Way I Are
77. getting rear ended when its not my car or my fault
78. legoland
79. making jokes about manhattan beach bitches and their credit cards
80. sitting with him and saying nothing and thinking about everything we could do, if only...
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Russell
Today I was walking to a Rite-Aid and there was a homeless man in front of it. As I walked by I broke the cardinal rule of not making eye contact. So there was a full 2 seconds of eye contact with this strange homeless man.
I went into Rite-Aid and bought myself some M&M's because I was craving some. Then as I was leaving I saw he was still sitting there and I know that once you make eye contact you have to at least give change. Well, I was better than that, and I had a half hour to waste before my ride came, so I walk to him and say, "hey if I buy you dinner will you talk to me for a while?" and he agreed, so I went to the Denny's across the street and bought some pancakes for the homeless guy. He was like, "OMG pancakes, I haven't had pancakes in so long."
He wasn't a crazy homeless guy btw. Just homeless.
So I sat down across from him and snacked on my M&M's while he started talking to me. His name was Russell something or other and he'd been homeless for about 3 years. He looked to be about 36-37, but I'm guessing he was really like 34. He had short brown hair and was relatively clean shaven for a homeless guy.
I thought he was just gonna tell me what it was like to be homeless, but instead he launched into his whole life story:
The Story Of Russell Something or Other, as retold by Me.
Russell grew up in a small town in Norcal somewhere, I cant remember the name exactly, but he said it was about an hour from SanFran. He was a good kid, no trouble, no problems, parents were together. He had a older brother who liked to fish. He had good grades all through school, like, honor roll type of grades. 3.5 ish. He had a best friend who broke his leg in 3 places by jumping out of a tree. His first girlfriends name was Cindy, and she had blonde hair. She didn't like fishing and Russell's brother would wave fish in her face all the time, which made Russell mad.
His father owned a painting company, and Russell was supposed to take over the company since his brother had already said that he wasn't going to waste his life getting high on paint fumes. So Russell spent long hours with his father painting walls. This, russell said, made for a very boring childhood.
In his sophmore year of high school, Cindy got drunk one night and demanded that Russell "give it to her," which, being a 16 year old boy, he was not going to refuse. She got pregnant, but miscarried before the end of the 3rd month. Shortly after, they broke up.
For his 17th birthday, he got a new puppy that he named Momba. Momba was a black lab that followed him everywhere he went. Not more than 6 months after, somebody killed Momba in the middle of the night with a gardening shovel. You know, the pointy one. "That was the saddest moment of my life, waking up and realizing that Momba was dead."
Soon after turning 18 he graduated from his high school and continued working for his father at the painting company. He worked there for another three years until...
A girl he had met at a bar told him she was pregnant with his child. He married her only a little past his 21st birthday. His first son, Michael Owen, was born April 15th, 199?. He was a beautiful baby with lovely brown hair and green eyes. He loved his son, but fought with his wife almost every day. He was careful though, not to fight in front of Michael. His second son, Kyle was born April 17th, 2 years after Michael. He looked just like Michael did as an infant. Things with his wife only got worse, but he was careful never to be abusive in any way to her or the kids. 10 months after Kyle, his wife had two more kids, identical twins they named Theodore and Greggory.
They got a divorce soon after, but she allowed Russell to live there with the kids. Things got better for a while, and one night they went out for drinks. Well, long story short, he wakes up in his car alone, two days have gone by, and he has no idea where he is. When he drives back home, he finds that his ex-wife packed up everything, and took the kids and dissapeared. He had nothing. No wallet, no keys, no money. All he had were the clothes on his back and his car, which wouldn't last long if he didn't have any money.
The first thing he did was sell his car so he'd have enough money to buy clothes and food for himself. He got aprox 2500 for it. With this money, he bought clothes and a good pair of shoes and a backpack. Then he started walking south, where he'd never been but had heard so much about. Sometimes as he was walking through a town he'd see some kids having a party, and there'd be so many people, nobody would notice him. He'd take showers there and take their toothpaste and razors and soap sometimes so that he wouldn't have to spend money on it. A few times he took showers there.
Eventually he got to Santa Monica, and Venice. He spent a good amount of time in Venice with his new friends he made there. Sometimes he would go to libraries and search for his wifes name online, not to find her, but to find his four kids.
I met Russell at Rite Aid because he is still going south. He says he is going to San Diego, and from there he'll go east to Arizona where he knows real estate is cheap, and he can buy a house and get his life back. He misses his kids a lot and you can tell he beats himself up everyday for not being there for them.
He tells me hes got about 4 thousand dollars, which is in no way rich, because that really is all he has.
Oh russell.
I went into Rite-Aid and bought myself some M&M's because I was craving some. Then as I was leaving I saw he was still sitting there and I know that once you make eye contact you have to at least give change. Well, I was better than that, and I had a half hour to waste before my ride came, so I walk to him and say, "hey if I buy you dinner will you talk to me for a while?" and he agreed, so I went to the Denny's across the street and bought some pancakes for the homeless guy. He was like, "OMG pancakes, I haven't had pancakes in so long."
He wasn't a crazy homeless guy btw. Just homeless.
So I sat down across from him and snacked on my M&M's while he started talking to me. His name was Russell something or other and he'd been homeless for about 3 years. He looked to be about 36-37, but I'm guessing he was really like 34. He had short brown hair and was relatively clean shaven for a homeless guy.
I thought he was just gonna tell me what it was like to be homeless, but instead he launched into his whole life story:
The Story Of Russell Something or Other, as retold by Me.
Russell grew up in a small town in Norcal somewhere, I cant remember the name exactly, but he said it was about an hour from SanFran. He was a good kid, no trouble, no problems, parents were together. He had a older brother who liked to fish. He had good grades all through school, like, honor roll type of grades. 3.5 ish. He had a best friend who broke his leg in 3 places by jumping out of a tree. His first girlfriends name was Cindy, and she had blonde hair. She didn't like fishing and Russell's brother would wave fish in her face all the time, which made Russell mad.
His father owned a painting company, and Russell was supposed to take over the company since his brother had already said that he wasn't going to waste his life getting high on paint fumes. So Russell spent long hours with his father painting walls. This, russell said, made for a very boring childhood.
In his sophmore year of high school, Cindy got drunk one night and demanded that Russell "give it to her," which, being a 16 year old boy, he was not going to refuse. She got pregnant, but miscarried before the end of the 3rd month. Shortly after, they broke up.
For his 17th birthday, he got a new puppy that he named Momba. Momba was a black lab that followed him everywhere he went. Not more than 6 months after, somebody killed Momba in the middle of the night with a gardening shovel. You know, the pointy one. "That was the saddest moment of my life, waking up and realizing that Momba was dead."
Soon after turning 18 he graduated from his high school and continued working for his father at the painting company. He worked there for another three years until...
A girl he had met at a bar told him she was pregnant with his child. He married her only a little past his 21st birthday. His first son, Michael Owen, was born April 15th, 199?. He was a beautiful baby with lovely brown hair and green eyes. He loved his son, but fought with his wife almost every day. He was careful though, not to fight in front of Michael. His second son, Kyle was born April 17th, 2 years after Michael. He looked just like Michael did as an infant. Things with his wife only got worse, but he was careful never to be abusive in any way to her or the kids. 10 months after Kyle, his wife had two more kids, identical twins they named Theodore and Greggory.
They got a divorce soon after, but she allowed Russell to live there with the kids. Things got better for a while, and one night they went out for drinks. Well, long story short, he wakes up in his car alone, two days have gone by, and he has no idea where he is. When he drives back home, he finds that his ex-wife packed up everything, and took the kids and dissapeared. He had nothing. No wallet, no keys, no money. All he had were the clothes on his back and his car, which wouldn't last long if he didn't have any money.
The first thing he did was sell his car so he'd have enough money to buy clothes and food for himself. He got aprox 2500 for it. With this money, he bought clothes and a good pair of shoes and a backpack. Then he started walking south, where he'd never been but had heard so much about. Sometimes as he was walking through a town he'd see some kids having a party, and there'd be so many people, nobody would notice him. He'd take showers there and take their toothpaste and razors and soap sometimes so that he wouldn't have to spend money on it. A few times he took showers there.
Eventually he got to Santa Monica, and Venice. He spent a good amount of time in Venice with his new friends he made there. Sometimes he would go to libraries and search for his wifes name online, not to find her, but to find his four kids.
I met Russell at Rite Aid because he is still going south. He says he is going to San Diego, and from there he'll go east to Arizona where he knows real estate is cheap, and he can buy a house and get his life back. He misses his kids a lot and you can tell he beats himself up everyday for not being there for them.
He tells me hes got about 4 thousand dollars, which is in no way rich, because that really is all he has.
Oh russell.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Hooray!
After a long and unnecessary hiatus...
Here i Is.
But not right now. Now is dinner time with "the gang." (Seriously, who actually says that?)
So I'll be back later to tell you all about everything.
Here i Is.
But not right now. Now is dinner time with "the gang." (Seriously, who actually says that?)
So I'll be back later to tell you all about everything.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
I Will Not Be Silenced
Sitting today at the Eco Cafe, my place of worship, I was talking to this guy Case (Short for casey?) about my vacation, and what I'd been doing. I started talking to him about CrimethInc. and he was telling me about it too and it was a jolly good time until this lady came over to us and said that we were "interrupting her luncheon with her friend." We weren't talking very loud, or being vulgar, anything like that, and that lady had no right to even speak to us. (Fucking bitch had a fur lined jacket. Fuck was she doing in a vegan cafe?) Anyway, so I apologized for the crime Case and I hadn't committed, and so she went back to being a bitch with her friend. Well, Case is like, totally awesome, and has all these little booklets on anarchy and veganism and so he gets them out and proceeds to write in one. What he does is flip to the center fold and draws the lady in her fur jacket and a whole bunch of skeleton animals around it, then draws a skeleton animal wearing her skin, while her skeleton stands in a corner. All in all, it was pretty intense for a sharpie drawing. We continue our own luncheon and when we're ready to leave Case tells me to go outside and wait, which I do. I'm waiting waiting and then I see him talking to the lady and shes nodding and then he walks towards me. Outside, we see her open it with her friend and then the faces they make as they get to the center fold is absolutely priceless.
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