The Blood Drive Story

So today was the begining of the blood drive.

Alexis and I signed up for the same time so that we could do it together and not be afraid. So I left my class to go to hers, and I sat outside and I heard Mr. Gilman giving her a hard time about saving lives and donating blood. (Not that his class is all that important anyway, its photo.)
So we went there and they gave us this packet to read about all the stuff that you makes you inellegable to donate. Basically you can't donate blood if:
a) You've taken prostate enlarging drugs.
b) You've visited a hooker, and/or you are a hooker.
Stuff like that.
Anyway, so then they take you behind this curtain and ask when your birthday is and stuff, and then they prick your finger with this thing and put some blood in a machine. Well, I did that, and then the lady said "Oh your blood sugar is a little low." So she gets up to get the head doctor nurse lady to look at it, and I'm sitting there thinking, "oh fuck theyre gonna tell me im diabetic." So they come back and the lady looks at it and says, I'm gonna have to do it again. Which, getting pricked in the finger hurts like a bitch. And I had to have it twice.
Then she leaves, and gives me this computer that I have to click yes or no to silly questions like, "Have I had sex with anyone who lived in africa?" or "Have I had gay sex?" or my personal favorite, "Have I had sex with a man who had sex with a man in the last 12 months?"
So then I finish that and they tell me to go and lie on this big lounge chair, and I see that Alexis (who went for questioning after me, and so did raquel, are already laying down on other lounge chairs. They give me this red ball that I have to squeeze so they can find a vein and so I had fun like, squeezing it. So they stick me with a needle and its pretty gnarly watching the blood pulse (not just flow, but pulse) through the tube and into the bag. So then I start talking to Jordan about college and fashion design and san francisco, and I look over at alexis and shes like got the needle in and theres blood like halfway through but its not going any farther, so they take it out and put a new one in the other arm.
Then I finish pumping blood, and this guy comes over and starts talking to me about how his son took his motorcycle and scratched it but wont own up to doing it while he takes the needle out and what not.
So Im walking over to the table with food and stuff and I look back and theres like 4 people around raquel cause she like almost passed out or what not. Scary stuff I guess.
Anyway, so I was sitting at the table and I had a cute little bottle of water, and Shane Loftis was sitting next to me and he had like 20 bottles lined up and he was drinking them, and some guy was telling him to break 100 (oz that is). So I had water and some cookies and then I saw these cool pins. They say "It's my first time." And thats it. No anything like, "blood drive" or "red cross" or anything. Theyre hilarious.

The End!