I regret nothing.
You want to know why I took it out?
I am not afraid of anything. I wasn't afraid to put it in. I wasn't afraid of seeing it through both sides. I wasn't afraid when I had to put a safety pin in. I wasn't afraid of getting caught, and I wasn't afraid of what people think or what they say. I stand behind my actions 100%, and I never back down.
So why did I take it out, you say?
Even though it didn't cause me any pain, it did to others. How many times have you gotten mad and said to yourself, "When I'm dead they'll see how much they love me. Then they'll care." I didn't try to off myself, but its the same idea. I had no idea so many people gave a shit about what I did. And they were all so worried and concerned that I felt bad. I had caused this. And I couldn't stand for that.


"No doubt. No regret. No fear."

Judge Me

I love this song.

Today I punched a kid in the face because he was holding a kitten by the tail and wouldn't put it down when I told him to. So I punched him in the face. Everyone who hurts animals can come get a punch in the face. By the way, he kicked me and then ran away. But it was worth it. Don't fuck with little things or you'll deal with me (and get punched in the face, which nobody likes).

Quote:

"Every girl I've ever dated has been hurt by guys. I have to work so hard to prove that I'm not a jerk; that we're not all the same."

It's weird keeping a blog and a journal at the same time.

I realize that the end part of Made Up Love Song #43 gets a little out there, but thats the Guillemots for you. The beginning is good. Don't disagree.

Finally, the week is over. Why did this week seem like it just drug on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on? Was it just me? Doesn't matter, because the weekend is here. And its gonna be good. I have a feeling.

Made Up Love Song #43

Dream Sequences?

Last night, I had a series of dreams. None of them were really coherent or seem to have any connection, but I had all four of them in the same sleeping time.
The first one was powderpuff-esque. There was Team K (which is my team in powderpuff, I didn't name it after myself, Katherine named it) and the other team was wearing pink and green. The only thing that happened in my dream was that we were walking into a huddle and I look over my shoulder and the other team wearing pink and green has broken into a choreographed dance routine.
The next dream I had was that I was walking with someone, but I can't remember who, although it was someone I know. Then we were hiding in a dark spot and there was one of those sirens going off and then rumbling and then he kissed me and then we both realized that we shouldn't have done that.
The third dream had me walking through the desert and it was raining, and then there was a tidal wave, and so I ran to it and tried to swim through it. But I only got halfway through before someone pulled me out and into a boat. In the boat there was Bam Margera and Casey Lee starting a fight, and I was like, what are you guys doing here? But they started to fight and bam was getting bam'd and then i see over at the other end of the boat is my friend Kade and he's binding and telling me to shush cause he doesn't want Bam to know his secret.
The last one involved me and jacob walking on a tiny little sun in the middle of space. We were walking hand in hand and I kept telling him that it was pointless to keep going. But he told me that we were almost there, but he wouldnt tell me where. We walked and walked on this tiny sun and then I got tired of it so I kissed him goodbye and then i jumped off the sun and left him behind.

Who Am I?

Lately I've been thinking I'm not quite who I'm supposed to be. People have been telling me, "oh, if they're smart, they've probably picked up on it anyway. If they pay attention to you then they should have noticed." But I don't know how obvious it is. Anyone know what I'm talking about and can back up these people's claims?

The third picture

The best one of my best fauxhawk was fuzzy and shit so there's this one instead. Sorry.

Hair Adventures

It's amazing what can be accomplished with enough product. 

Try several products.
This is what I accomplished:




theres another one too but blogger isnt working so ill try later...

yeah
i was a little bored today
but...

oh well.
all for your entertainment....

rip

The guy who invented Gatorade died. He was eighty.

How sad right? I love gatorade.

The Driving Adventure Begins...

...And already I hate it. Ugh god. So, my certificate of completion for drivers ed came in the mail today and my dad went over all these ground rules and things I'm going to have to do while he teaches me to drive. Here's some of them:

- No radio. You have to listen and concentrate.

-"I'm going to take you to the desert and have you turn at 4o on the dirt and not lose control."

- Pay for your own insurance!! Yeah, its 200 a month. Bummer.

- You can work real hard over the summer and earn money for a beat up car you can reck so you can buy a new beat up car.

Ugh.

So when you see me, tell me its going to be okay. And maybe buy me a cookie. Or not. Whatever.

SAT

I took the SAT today and it was some dumb shit.

But the hilight of it was this morning, when I was waiting to go into the room, I see Matt McFarland running (with the sandals he always wears, causing him to not really run but just walk fast/hop) and his "grr somebody is in trouble for (insert problem here) but of course its not me because i'm the perfect and awesome matt mcfarland" face. It was a riot.

The Gun Shot Dream

Last night I had a dream. I don't have dreams very often, so when I do I regard them as being prophetic in a metaphorical sort of way.

In my dream, the first thing I remember was that I got shot. I was lying face down on the ground and I had two shots in my stomach. I thought I was going to die from these gunshots, and it just so happened that I had a gun in my hand, so I put it right at my right temple. I tried to say anything. But I couldn't, so I pulled the trigger. But I didn't die right away. So, knowing that I was going to die soon, I put my head down and closed my eyes. I tried talking to pass the time, but the only thing I could think of was how mad Jacob would be that I killed myself, so I kept saying "I love you Jacob" but I wasn't really saying it, because I couldn't talk. So I was just lying face down on the ground mouthing it over and over again. I didn't think to say anything else. But, I wasn't dying. I put my head up and opened my eyes, and everything was red, like someone with bloodshot eyes. Like when you puke so hard that blood goes into your eyes and you see red like through a red filter. Anyway, I kept trying to say things, I was basically screaming them in my head. Then, I decided I didn't want to die. But I had no idea what to do about it. After all, I had two bullets in my stomach and one in my brain. I tried to get up, thinking that it wouldn't work that well, but instead I found I could get up and walk around. I put my hood up so that people wouldn't see the hole in my head, and I started walking through town. I came across a paparazzi who asked if I had seen what happened. There was something going on across the street, but I thought he meant what had happened to me, so I told him I got shot and kept walking. I got to the police station because I thought they could help me and I told the police officer what happened. He said that he couldn't take me to the hospital because he was the only officer in the station that night and he couldn't leave. But he said there were band-aids in the bathroom if I wanted to use them. So I went in the bathroom looking for the band-aids, and there was a mirror. When I looked in it, I expected half my head to be gone, but instead, there was no blood or hole or anything. I frantically searched for it, and then pulled up my shirt and looked for the other two. They were gone! When I looked back in the mirror, I noticed this small thing sitting on my shoulder. I looked closer and saw that it was a mini bloodied version of me with the holes I had been looking for earlier. It scared me cause it was all bloody and so I tried to brush it off, but it didn't work and instead it just said "Memento Mori" which I remembered is Latin for "Remember that you must die." 

Then I woke up cause I was scared. I guess its more of a nightmare than a dream. Actually, all my dreams are nightmares.

Oh well. I hope you enjoyed my night adventures.

Good Old Days

(It's just the song I mention later, there's no video.)

For some reason, lately I've been trying to reconstruct a playlist from my darker days. I've done a fairly good job, considering I didn't know any of the names of the songs or the DJ's. Right now the list is at 16 songs, although I know that's such a small amount of the actual songs I've ever fallen in love with from that time period.

But as I've listened to the songs, the ones that I remember always have this certain style. They always have this fatty bass line in the back. Nothing special, just that ongoing beat. It's the beat that you can only hear on ipods if you push the headphones farther into your ears. Its the one that you can feel when you go to concerts. The bass drum. All my songs have that.

Another thing I've noticed is that they all have this dark sort of tone to them. I was never the happy rave kid. I wasn't the one who sat in the corners either, but I always enjoyed the songs that were more industrial instead of more like carnival music type. It's just dark. And I know you're questioning my judgement when I describe songs by darkness and lightness, but you know what I mean. Don't deny it.

I Love My Sex, by Benny Benassi is a terrific example of the songs I listened to. It's got the deepest bass line I've almost ever heard (I can hear it without smushing the headphones into my ears) and its got that synth thats just so typical of Benassi songs, be it Satisfaction or Illusion. If I had to pick something to relate the sounds to, it would be the sound that electricity makes, but without all the crackling and a lot louder. Just the buzz sound. It's awesome. 

I'm sorry if I'm confusing, but trying to explain why certain songs are good as opposed to bad ones is like explaining myspace to an old person. 

Transgender Remembrance Day

I'm not emo. I hate arm bands. I don't wear all black.

Except for today I did.

So when someone pointed at me today and said, "yeah! white arm bands! yeahhhhhh!!" I felt compelled to correct her.

I explained that today is Transgender Remembrance Day and she stood there witht his puzzled look on her face. "Whats that?" she asked me.

Almost too stunned at what she was asking, I paused and asked, "Whats what?" 

"What's transgender?"

Seriously, do people not know what it is, or was it just my lucky day that I found the one girl who didn't. Anyway, I gave here a brief description of what it was, which I'm pretty sure she wasn't listening to.

But then she formed a brilliant question in the empty space between her ears, one which she felt compelled to ask me:

"Oh, you mean like Chris Crocker?"

I may not be transgendered, but somehow I feel that I represent at least someone when I say that I am embarrassed for the T community when it comes to Chris Crocker. People obviously know nothing about transgender, and the only person they know is the new spokesperson; Chris Fucking Crocker. This brash and cocky "star" is some people's first and sometimes only view of the transgendered community. And this ANGERS ME! People don't want to be judged by other people's actions! What if Michael Jackson represented the Black Community? It's unfair for a group to be evaluated and value based upon one eccentric representative. Maybe the reason that transgendered people are so looked down upon is because of the few that make it into mainstream society.

Its no wonder that they're commonly seen as freaks and unaccepted in society. Look at the models they have to base themselves off of.

The KKK Ghost

Yay! Photo of the day!

Here's the first one ever:

The KKK Ghost

Old emails from way back when.

i was reading through my old emails today, and I found the ones that jacob and I wrote before we went to see the show that basically changed my life.

Why did it change my life?

Well, it solidified my love for Against Me!, it introduced me to Fake Problems (the love of my life), I saw Jacob for the first time in 5 years, i met dave and I met Jake!.

But the emails are funny because in them he's like describing Jake, but I don't know its jake, I just think its some scary guy. "He's a totally awesome guy. He'll love you." he told me.

Go now, and read old emails!

Hey guys.
Gonna go cut my hair!
Yeah. Right now, by myself.
See you later!

Search and you will find:

I love youtube

Borderliners

I know this is the third post of the night.

But I was reading my favorite book and my favorite part came up and I just felt so compelled to write it somewhere. So I chose here:

He went on, "I could have stayed at home. We were just fine, we could have sat together in the evenings, like we'd been doing. Not too close together, nobody bothering anybody else, no need to be all over one another. But you're together, quiet and peaceful. If anyone feels like drawing they can just get some paper and a pencil, nothing will be said about it. No one goes on about your grades. No one gets hit. But then you're dragged up here. You're tied down at night, during the day Flakkedam sits behind you. Tell Mom how a thing like that can happen."

Biehl was on his knees, so his face was level with August's.

"We wanted to do good," he said.

Another finger broke.

All of a sudden Biehl's lips were like sandpaper. Gray and as though dusted with dried granules. He looked August in the eye.

"We wanted to help," he said. "Not just he children of the light. We wanted to carry the rest of you along with us. From the halls of the dead to the land of the living. We wanted to bring all of you together in the Danish Free School. Even those who suffer hardships have a right to the light."

August's body was now shaking badly, even his face was out of control, it looked like he was constantly making faces. Only the hand encircling Biehl's fingers did not move. It held the last of the life within him.

"What about the darkness inside people?" said Katarina.

"The light will disperse it," said Biehl.

August brought his face right down to Biehl's ear. They looked like two people exchanges confidences.

"There's not that much light in the whole world," he whispered.

I think about you everyday.

It's funny how today can be so good.

And so bad.

Not exactly the song I was thinking about. It applies to someone I'm not trying to apply it to...

but

whatever.

I can't think of a better one.

Without getting myself into trouble with someone else:

I miss my other half. As the song says, I feel like I've lost everything when you're gone/left remembering what it's like to have you here with me.

And you KNOW WHAT??

Ugh.

He wrote damn good poetry.

Naughty Or Nice?

I'm listening to Christmas songs.

But not typical christmas songs. Theyre like... versions done by matchbook romance and stuff like that. You know how it goes. But not just like, emo crap. (Not that MR is emo crap...) theres stuff from the dickies too. A little something for everyone.

Today was fun.

Went to chad's house and watched him play games. Look for the videos here maybe tonite or tomorrow. Probably tomorrow. Actually, don't bother checking back tonite because they'll be here tomorrow.

Chili Beans and Poodles,

Me.

NOOSES n GOOSES!

Everyone.
I learned to tie a noose today.

I drew a goose too.
And then made one out of foil with Jacksonnnnn.
Actually it was a four headed goose.

Because you asked...

Top 10

1. Fake Problems
2. Against Me!
3. C. AARME
4. The God Awfuls
5. Underminded
6. Oingo Boingo
7. Jet Lag Gemini
8. Sex Pistols
9. Greenbrier Lane
10. Bad Religion

It's Not Fair!!!

One of my top 10 favorite bands is playing a show (something they rarely do) in socal and at the glass house. Yeah. The God Awfuls. And I was like, YES! I'm going to go!

But...

(Yeah, there's always a "but...")

It's on the 15th of december. And thats when my parents have their annual xmas party. And of course I have to be there, so I can pour drinks for old people. And entertain drunk people.

Fun!

9. Have you ever thrown up from working out?
YUP!
I THROW UP A LOT! IM WATCHING MY FIGURE!

Little Girls by Oingo Boingo



Things were so much better when bands synchronized danced together...

Fyi. In case you cant tell I <3 Oingo Boingo. And young Danny Elfman. Not old Danny Elfman. He's old.

3 posts in one day?

The picture I drew today.
Not the best. I apologize.




Can you guess who it is?

The Demented Cartoon Movie

No matter how bad of a day I'm having, this always cheers me up. And somehow, it's still as funny now as it was when I was barely 13.






I <3 U Demented Cartoon Movie.
I <3 U most of all.

Is there any ease?
After the pain,
Truly a sunshine?
For every time it rains.

Todays date is uh...

I'm not even sure what day it is. Days are blending together. I haven't had sleep in 3 days, other than the odd catnap in chem class. My best friend is dying and I'm eating cookies and writing about my pointless life.

Today is day three of hell week. It's not all that hellish, except for the rediculous hours. And when I say rediculous, I mean completely redonculous. So that's why I'll be signing up next semester for the spring musical: Beauty and the Beast.

Everytime something is wrong or something just isn't good, he always told me this:

"Having faith is not easy. I know you have it. I don't mean religious faith; this faith is defined as an unquestioning belief that does not require proof or evidence. It's about being able to look at any situation and following your instinct. It's about knowing that everything will be all right in the end. Don't worry about what you can do or what you can't do. It's all gonna work out for the best."

Happy November Fourth!

Today is Sunday, November 4th, 2007.
Lots of stuff happened today, and it was AWESOME.

Tomorrow begins hell week. Hell week means that I will be at school from 7am to 11pm. Thats right. 16 hours of schooltime. 8 of it is for Assassins though. Don't see it. It's not that cool. I mean, see it if you want to, but I'm warning you that it sucks. So don't blame me when you want your money back.

Justen, I'm glad you're having a good day. Now call me and tell me why.

I've got stuff to do tonight, so I'll see you all later.

Love you guys.
-petey

Virginia Pictures!

yes, finally, the wait is over.

http://virginiapictures.blogspot.com/



lol.

homecoming pictures to follow.

My string theory.

Do you ever get that weird feeling that there's a string connected to one of your left ribs, just below the heart, and that certain things or people or smells seem to pull on that string a little bit? And it kinda hurts in that not-painful-but-still-slightly-uncomfortable way? Like when you like someone?

Do you know what I'm talking about or do I just have some weird heart condition?

Some Things that Pull on My String
a. When I think jacob is around and hes not
b. When random people hug me for no reason
c. When I see a person from my List
e. the way fat beaver smells (code name)
f. staying up all night talking to anyone
g. when i miss people


-------------------

Today whilst at rehersal for ASS ASS INS, Jackson told me he needed to pick a song that describes him. We came up with this list:

- Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado
- Toxic by Britney Spears
- Fergalicious by Fergie

I wonder what he'll pick.

Old Hallows Eve

So tonight was halloween. A holiday I consider to be nearly perfect. (except for the sluts.)

Chad and I sang a lovely duet of "Baby I'm An Anarchist."

Jake and I discussed coathangers.

Fifer

Today some kid yelled at me, "Hey, your sister called, and she wants her pants back."

I had tight black pants on and my FP jacket zipped up.

So I turned around and keyed his piece of shit truck.

Ha ha.

Evil.

TTVAT pt 14

It's 11.09 local time. That's hb time.
Yeah, I made it home.

I was in Missouri, and there was a screaming baby who did not shut up. It just cried and cried for like 45 minutes during the whole descent.

I saw the big arch thing there as we were flying out, and so now I never need to go back to st louis. It's great how things work out like that.

I'm really tired. I'm dreading school tomorrow. Assassins is coming up this week too. I'm not going to get any sleep this week, or next. Although I am excited that someone is buying blue jeans...

Haha.

I love you guys!

Love
Me.

TTVAT pt 13

It’s 4.28 local time. The plane doesnt leave until 5.30. we’re sitting in the norfolk airport. I bought some lemonade and some sunchips. You know, cause they’re chips of the sun.

This morning we went to Virginia Beach and took pictures at the Atlantic Ocean. We then went to applebees and there was this guy Brandon who my mom said was cute, and I told her that “he knows hes cute” and I had to explain that whole thing. You know, like how a hot girl knows shes hot? You menfolk know what I’m talking aobut? I had to explain that to my mom. Fun stuff right?

Then we went to the airport and we looked at all these stupid things in the airport giftshops that might be buyable if they were like 1/2 the price.Otherwise theyre just stupid stupid. Yes, two stupids.

Something is beeping really loudly, like someone broke into something. I’m thinking its this old lady at the atm. Oh wait, shes not old, shes just old looking. She obviously smokes. Ew. Her face. Old. Southern. Trailer trash. Gross.

Shes gone now.

Everywhere in this airport there are mermaids. Mermaids are like the mascot of the airport. I could buy a mug at the gift shop that says norfolk on it and has a mermaid on it too.

I asked my mom if Norfolk meant something like sea people or ocean people or fin people cause then then its like nor=ocean and folk=people and then all the people who live here are mermaids and mermens.

She said no.

TTVAT pt 12

Today we went to williamsburg and I bought a fife and a declaration of independence. I'm not sure why. But so now I have them. Tomorrow we're getting on the plane at 5.30 local time to go home.

There will be lots of good pictures when I get home. So look for them!

K. Toodles!

TTVAT pt 11

Johnathan is telling me his name is Johnafer. And I thought he said his name was Johnathan and he was telling me it was Jennifer. And so I said:

Me: Jennifer?
John: No Johnifer (I thought he said Jennifer)
Me: Jennifer?
John: No, JOHNnifer.
Me: (stillnot understanding) Jennifer?
John: No. John.
Me: John.
John: say "eff"
Me: Eff.
John: Johnifer.
Me: Johnifer??

So apparently my cousins name is Johnifer.

We played this gnarly version of monopoly where everything is worth like millions of dollars. Theres credit cards that you put in a calculator. It's quite magic.

The Anarchist Story

It's short bear with me.

So before we went to chuck e cheese we went to the army store where they sell all their army clothes and stuff. And I bought a jacket that says army on it (I support the troops not the war so dont hassle me about it) and so i'm standing in line with daniel and theres a bunch of soldiers around buying clothes and what not. And then my phone went off. And do you know what my ringtone is?

It's baby I'm an anarchist.
And I have the chorus. So no matter how fast you are getting a phone out of your pocket, it still will say "...cause baby, i'm an anarchist youre a sp--" and so im spastically turning off the phone and looking weird and now people are like "omg wtf??"

So I gathered my army jacket and daniels like laughing at me, and so I like run out of there.

TTVAT pt 10

It’s 520 local time.

We just got back from costco. Johnathan learned gnarly and tubular. I called Jacob too. Cause I finally had a minute to myself away from everyone. It was nice. Probably the best part of my day.

Now we’re going back to the base to have dinner. I’m really kinda tired, and I saw this guy who looked a lot like Dan from LGBT Lifeworks.

I just found out we’re going to Williamsburg for tonite a little too, as well as tomorrow. Tonite its for like this big witch thing. I’m not sure why, but like.. um... idk. Witches.

Dear Jacob. You’ve got me writing tonite instead of tonight. Silly you.

TTVAT pt 9

its 4.00 local time.

We just went to Chuck E. Cheese, and Johnathan and I went and played skiball. And I taught him how to play.
Then we ran out of coins and he stole my wallet and put a dollar in the machine and got some coins all before I noticed it was there. Crazy.

Ew. He’s licking this harmonica he got and wiping it on my arm. And I said EW GRODY and told him to do it to himself, so he did and he said, “ew grody” just like I did. Which made me laugh and so he’s doing it over again. Now the car is filled with the sounds of “Ew grody. Ew Grody ew grody ew grody ew grody”

We’re going to costco, me and my my mom and suzy and johnjohn. So while we’re in there I’m going to attempt to teach him more slang. Ha ha. Gnarly right?

It stopped raining so hard and now there’s blue skies. Tomorrow we’re going to Williamsburg, the weather permitting.

I also got JohnJohn to like Against Me! And its really funny because I played Thrash Unreal and told him it was bad and hes like “YEAH” and then I played some off of Reinventing and told him it was good and he started dancing. And not like dancing but like jumping around. Like how little kids do.

TTVAT pt 8

“Lord, be my pilot!” my mother just said.

So last night, my mother snored really really really loudly. And so I had my ipod up really loud, and so now I’m going to be even deafer than I was.

We just went to starbucks and my mother made a comment about how conservative everyone dresses. And I was like, Well duh, its cold here, they cant wear booty shorts and tube tops.

We’ve also agreed there are too many damn trees here. Trees are everywhere. I’m going to count the trees for 10 seconds. Every tree I see on the right of the freeway. Every x is a tree okay?
Okay go.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

OOMG

I had to stop because theyre playing thrash unreal on the radio! ANd my mom is like whyd you turn it up, and i told her that its against me and she was like omg really? I thot they wernt mainstream enoguh.

Anyways.

Now we’re going to the base. Tonite is chuck e cheese time. If they have a Jurassic Park with the seat that moves all over the place then I’m gonna play forever. I’m gonna rock it. I haven’t played that game in so long you know?

The base is really weird. First of all there are trees everywhere. There’s a railroad that goes right through the middle, and there are no real houses, just lots of appt buildings. I already told you they all have linoleum everywhere in them. There’s lots of grass and stuff, and sometimes you can look and see a big army truck going down the street, or you’ll see a group of soldiers all marching and yelling something. It’s intense. Everywehere you look ther is trash, or a spare tire, and you would expect the army to have a thing to keep it clean, since its the army,

TTVAT pt 7

It's 1021 local time.
After we went to the hotel, Suzie Kimi and Daniel came to pick us up, except Daniel didn't feel good so he didn't come inside. Then Kimi and Daniel went home for a while, and Suzie and me and mommy went to lunch at fudruckers. They had a big boat on the wall.
After that we went to the base. And it's really weird there because theres a hell of a lot of trees everywhere. And so we were inside the house and its tiny small and all the floors are linoleum. Everywhere. Except the stairs, and those are wood. It's government issue, standard.
Then we waited for the busses to drop off Megan and Johnathan. They were making fun of Johnathan beause Suzy dressed him in these really tiny jeans that looked like little girl jeans. So we had to go to the mall. After they were home we went to the mall and bought some jeans for him. And some other clothes. Daniel and Megan and I also went to Spencers (you know, spencers, the shop thats like hot topic except more like sex ish. You know what I'm talking about.) So then they were done with that and we started to leave because we had to go to Walmart. Except it was raining like mad hard, and so we sprinted to the car and suzy followed us but she dropped her purse in the rain and so all her stuff was wet and whatnot.
So we went to walmart, and nothing really special happened there.
Then we went back to the base and had dinner and watched the first half of knocked up.
It was stupid, and I have no intention of watching the end of it.

I've got to tell you that Virginia is the weirdest place on earth! Or maybe its just the East that's weird. Or maybe it's just the people on the base that are weird.

Oh well.

TTVAT pt 6

We just got to the hotel, thanks to my excellent navigational skills. It's awesome. Although, at one point my mom decided to make an executive decision and take a different freeway and get us lost. Not really lost though, just on the wrong freeway.
I will admit that I did miss the street that we were supposed to turn down to get to the hotel, but it wasn't my fault. There's no freaking sidewalks here, and I was amazed at that and so I wasn't looking for the hotel. Big deal though, right? We found it eventually.
So pretty soon we're gonna go up to fort eustice to see kimi and daniel and suzy and johnathan and megan. And hopefully eat. I'm really hungry...

Ill tell you about the flight later,
but i've got to go shower now.

Hugs and kisses.
Me.

TTVAT pt 5

Good morning everyone.
Omg. It’s 5.47 local time. (Still Dallas) That means it 3.48 Hb time. Awesome right?
I’m at DFW (Dallas/Ft Worth) sitting watching the news. I have hot chocolate. It’s pretty yummy.

We were waiting for the shuttle to the airport and it was really cold. Now I’m watching the news and it’s telling me it was 46 degrees. No wonder it was so freaking cold.

There was this guy on the bus who I swear to god I thought was Casey Lee. He looked just like him, but with a different haircut.

Also, we saw the guy who missed his friends wedding again and he got coffee from the same place we did.

The art in here is really weird. It’s like there are giant crystal things right next to me. They look like a small version of the building that houses the line for Superman at six flags. They’re silver and totally out of place.

There were some girls in the shuttle who were complaining about american airlines. They went like this:

Girl 1: Yeah we switched to delta.
Girl 2: Uh huh. (Theyre black, and they totally fit the stereotypical way of saying uh huh)
Girl 1: It was our first time flying and it was awful.
Girl 2: Uh huh.
Girl 1: They’re retarded.
Girl 2: Uh huh retarded.
Girl 1: American airlines is retarded.
Girl 2: Uh huh. Retarded.

The end.

TTVAT pt 4

Howdy everyone!
Yes howdy!
It's 11.44 local time. Local meaning Dallas, Texas!
Thats right you guys. I finally made it to Texas. Our flight was delayed until four, and we didnt get here until 9.30. American Airlines felt bad about making us wait so long (Some guy I was talking to will be missing his friends wedding tomorrow morning because of it) and so they gave us a room to a hotel.
But it couldn't be a good hotel. Of course not. So right now, I'm sitting in a Ramada room. There's funny pink spots on the wall that looks like someone was "whacked" as my mom so eloquently put it.
So after waiting in line to check into the hotel for almost an hour (45 minutes) I stole some candy from them, and then we went to Denny's across the street. I had pankakes. And the guy who missed the wedding was there with some other lady who was going to the same place he was (Atlanta Georgia).

Also fun stuff:
We don't have luggage because they wanted to keep it in a "secure location."
DAMN YOU AMERICAN AIRLINES!!!
(I want my phone charger.)

:(

All in all though, it's pretty cool. Texas is awesome. Although its like 58 degrees outside and all I have are my cutoffs and a light jacket.
My mom and I are sitting listening to "All My Ex's Live In Texas" just because.
Also, it says Welcome to Texas on the inside of the door.
I picked up this brochure for this Gun Range, and it says that I can "Just Show Up and Shoot!" and I can "Try Renting a Full-Auto Sub Machine Gun"
Anyone interested?
214.630.4866



Love from the road,
Me

TTVAT pt 3

Sweet. It's 3.51.

Not leaving till four supposedly.
So we will for sure be staying in Dallas for the night.

Some business man just dropped his phone and now hes looking at it and he sort of looks like he's going to cry. What a loser. If its that important, shouldnt he have taken better care of it? I think so.

TTVAT pt 2

So omg.
Im still at LAX. It's 3.09 pm.
First, there was a problem with the plane, so they switched it, and they said that we would board at 3. Obviously, we did not board at 3. So now it says 3.30, and so we're sitting here. Now we're going to miss the layover in Dallas and so we get to spend the night in TEXAS!
I'm not really sure if I'm excited or not. I mean, cool! Texas! but then at the same time its like, Well, then it causes problems.
Cause then what if the luggage goes on to Norfolk, and I'm stuck in Dallas?

DAMN YOU AMERICAN AIRLINES!

TTVAT pt 1

Hey yous guys.
It's 1:48 pm and I'm sitting in a terminal waiting for a plane. Not the right terminal of course. We're supposed to be at 46A and we're sitting in 43B. Don't ask why.
A lot has happeend in the 45 minutes I've been here.
First, we were walking and my mom pointed at some funny dressed men (I'll draw a picture and show you some other time.) And then I looked left and I didn't watch where I was going and I ran into one of them head on. And I was all oh sorry! and he had a brittish accent and it was AWESOME. (I <3 brits. Theyre awesome.)

The Blood Drive Story special features

At request of a reader (or two...) I will answer the questions that I was asked on the test thing.

Sex Testicle: (Test + Quiz= Testicle)

Q: Are you in good health today?
A: Yes.

Q: Have you had sex with anyone who lived in africa?
A: No.

Q: Have you had gay sex?
A: No.

Q: Have you had sex with a man who had sex with a man in the last 12 months?
A. No?

Q: Have you lived with anyone who had hepatitis?
A: No.

Q: Have you taken any of the following drugs:
-drug for baldness
-drug for prostate enlargement
-drug for short people to get tall (discontinued 5 years before i was even born)
-others
A: No.

The Blood Drive Story

So today was the begining of the blood drive.

Alexis and I signed up for the same time so that we could do it together and not be afraid. So I left my class to go to hers, and I sat outside and I heard Mr. Gilman giving her a hard time about saving lives and donating blood. (Not that his class is all that important anyway, its photo.)
So we went there and they gave us this packet to read about all the stuff that you makes you inellegable to donate. Basically you can't donate blood if:
a) You've taken prostate enlarging drugs.
b) You've visited a hooker, and/or you are a hooker.
Stuff like that.
Anyway, so then they take you behind this curtain and ask when your birthday is and stuff, and then they prick your finger with this thing and put some blood in a machine. Well, I did that, and then the lady said "Oh your blood sugar is a little low." So she gets up to get the head doctor nurse lady to look at it, and I'm sitting there thinking, "oh fuck theyre gonna tell me im diabetic." So they come back and the lady looks at it and says, I'm gonna have to do it again. Which, getting pricked in the finger hurts like a bitch. And I had to have it twice.
Then she leaves, and gives me this computer that I have to click yes or no to silly questions like, "Have I had sex with anyone who lived in africa?" or "Have I had gay sex?" or my personal favorite, "Have I had sex with a man who had sex with a man in the last 12 months?"
So then I finish that and they tell me to go and lie on this big lounge chair, and I see that Alexis (who went for questioning after me, and so did raquel, are already laying down on other lounge chairs. They give me this red ball that I have to squeeze so they can find a vein and so I had fun like, squeezing it. So they stick me with a needle and its pretty gnarly watching the blood pulse (not just flow, but pulse) through the tube and into the bag. So then I start talking to Jordan about college and fashion design and san francisco, and I look over at alexis and shes like got the needle in and theres blood like halfway through but its not going any farther, so they take it out and put a new one in the other arm.
Then I finish pumping blood, and this guy comes over and starts talking to me about how his son took his motorcycle and scratched it but wont own up to doing it while he takes the needle out and what not.
So Im walking over to the table with food and stuff and I look back and theres like 4 people around raquel cause she like almost passed out or what not. Scary stuff I guess.
Anyway, so I was sitting at the table and I had a cute little bottle of water, and Shane Loftis was sitting next to me and he had like 20 bottles lined up and he was drinking them, and some guy was telling him to break 100 (oz that is). So I had water and some cookies and then I saw these cool pins. They say "It's my first time." And thats it. No anything like, "blood drive" or "red cross" or anything. Theyre hilarious.

The End!

Lol and some other stuff.

I'm sorry. I really couldn't help myself.

So today in theater management we were talking about homecoming (why today and not yesterday is anyones guess) and Cassie was telling me about all the slutty people that were like boning each other. (Earlier in the day Brett was telling me about how his friend had a boner at the dance and was basically sticking it up his dates ass. Awkward?) So she's talking about that, and then all the sudden she turns to me and says "Aww you guys were so damn cute."
"Why the hell are we so damn cute?" I asked.
"Cause you guys were all into each other and did that forehead thing and it was cute."

So okay. We're cute I suppose. But why was she staring at us?


Tomorrow is the blood drive! Hooray! 5th period I will be saving lives. I'm sure there will be a good story so look out for it.

Kisses and cumshots,
Me

Title of the Song:

The Asinine Assessments of an Aspiring Cowboy

In the end...

It isn't really about who's right or wrong, it's about who's first to realize that they need to apologize.

It's thursday night, and it's 10:46. I have no one to call and say hello, to just ask what they're up to. I think my laptop is electrically charged (duh) because every time I start typing something, the hairs on my arms stand up.

I had a dream last night that I was living in the runis of an underground bomb shelter with talking cartoon bananas. They thought I was going to eat them and so they beat me to death while bombs rained down from above.

To clarify some things:

I can write whatever I want here, and I don't have to explain it to anyone. That's the beauty of it.

No matter how many people I know, or how many may care, or how many will say "I love you too!" when I tell them that I love them, there is a void. One day I'm going to fill that void, but until then I am always searching.

I was given a little piece of advice today that I'm thinking about now:

"Believe the teachings of a raven."

Also right now, I'm reading the lyrics of "Tonight We're Gonna Give It 35%"

"Dear Jesus, are you listening?

If this is the once chance that really matters, well, don't let me fuck this up."



I love you all.

What a bitch.

So i was trying on dresses that i had around my house seeing which i wanted to wear to homecoming. And I was showing my mom, and she said, "you can wear that dress if you don't eat for like two days."

And she was serious.

You shhhitty bitshch!

Ten things.

1. List 10 things you want to say to 10 different people.
2. Don't list any names.
3. Never mention it again.




1. People are sneaky in so many ways. You can't trust them and you shouldn't. Even the ones you think you can trust most of all will ultimately betray you, even if it's behind your back. So when you finally find out about it, don't be so suprised. You just didn't know until then.

2. I've always wanted that guy friend that was always there for me for anything. That BEST guy friend. You know what I mean? I'm sorry I didn't realize it until now but you really are one of the best people to hang around. Just don't get nervous about silly things. Aren't guys supposed to like boobs? So don't freak out and be embarrassed when girls talk about them.

3. You are the loudest and most obnoxious bitch I know. God. Shut up. Every day you're standing there talking to a slightly less obnoxious bitch and then she'll say something funny and you'll laugh really fucking loud. You know the song that goes "laughing so loud that all the little people stare" ? Well, I stare. I'm not little though, and if you don't shut the fuck up then I'm going to punch you in the face one of these days. Seriously, it's really loud. I know you wouldn't know that when you laugh the whole room goes quiet, because you're too loud to hear the world around you. Grow up, and take the blue/green streak of color out of your hair.

4. I hate you. Rape isn't funny so don't laugh. I don't even care if you're fucking drunk, because there is no excuse.

5. You've screwed my sleeping habits. There are three things now that I have to have before I can sleep. One is Against Me! playing over the speakers, two is the Against Me! jacket I've come to know and love (and ridicule), and three is this little ball of light that really has nothing to do with you. You've changed me in so many ways even I'm unaware of all of them. I love our rediculous conversations about nothing, and all the adventures we have pretty much rock, but there are just some things I wish you wouldn't do. It's called perseverance.

6. I'm seventeen now, and I thought I'd never make it. Thanks for always having faith in my abilities, when no one else did. You'll never see that I'm gonna make it because of what you said to me. I'm gonna graduate, and I'm gonna get to college and I'm gonna do well. You were the best, and I'm sorry I let you down. But all I can do now is prove that you were right.

7. Long nights spent talking to you never make up for not being with you. I wish I lived closer, but changing the past alters the present, and I'm really glad I know you.

8. You were my best friend for so long, so what happened? When I went to high school everything changed and suddenly I wasn't cool enough for you. Well you know what? I really don't like your band that much, and your friend has ugly hair. But in a way you're still my surrogate little brother and all the years as friends still cause me to worry about you and defend your name when my parents badmouth you. You're gonna be something one day, I know, but I just don't know what, or when. All I can say is, stay in school and go to college, and it will all work out for the best.




I couldn't come up with 10. These are supposed to be angry letters too I found out. Oh well, I just don't have 10 people to be angry at.



Puppies and Teddybears,
Kristine

Dead Gofers and anarchists.

There were two good stories I heard today:

One was from chad, and it was about my dad and his stepdad eric. So they were down in the hell hole this weekend and my dad caught a gofer and suggested they suffocate it, so they put it in a garbage bag and then eric decided to smash it against the side of the house over and over again until it died.
So now i can nver go back to that house because of the ghost of the gofer that was murdered there.

The other story was from Justen. Justen's story is a bit funnier and a bit less gory. So justen has this friend Andy who apparently is a total anarchist. Like, completely. Don't ask for details on him cause I have none. But anyway, so he and justen have been working on an anarchist flag that they apparently finished this morning. So theymounted it on a stick and then strapped on helmets and justen got some gloves and andy a skateboard and they went to the highest hill they could find, and then rolled right down the middle of it waving the flag. Not down the sidewalk, but right down the street. So I can just imagine it. You're stopped at a red light and all the sudden you see this blob of wheelchair and two heads and a flag whizzing by you. The best part is that he said they went right by the police station and didnt get caught. Of course, nobody ever watches the police station. Cause its got cops. But yeah.


Oh people. You're so funny sometimes.

Love,
me.

Problems with everything...

I didn't do anything and somehow I'm in trouble. Not with my parents, but with Justen. I really didn't do anything and he's blaming me for shit I couldn't have possibly been around to do. Fuck. Fucking fucking fucking cancer. Ugh.

Believe me, you never want to watch someone begin to go downhill. It's the saddest fucking thing in the whole world. Until then, you don't know hell.

I'm listening to this old song I haven't heard in years, since the first person I claimed to have fallen in love with showed it to me. It's totally not what I'd enjoy at all; it's Last Dance WIth Mary Jane by Tom Petty. I have no idea why I like it. But for some reason I do. It's got parts that I like I guess. It just reminds me of good times and bad times and uh.. I don't know. It doesn't even relate to right now.

I need some fucking chocolate or something.



Just like smiles are contagious, so too is depression.

xoxo.

"I said hey and he turned around and fingered me."

Says Jackson. I guess he meant to say "he flipped me off" but it came out a little different. Oh well. That's just one reason that freshmen are so fucking funny sometimes.
Chad, Jackson and I were at the football game, and it was Middle School Night. Middle School Night is the dumbest fucking invention on the face of the fucking earth. I swear to god. In case you don't know, Middle School Night is when all the middle school kids are invited to come to the game. But they don't pay attention to the game. All they do is fight with eachother and run around and talk about stupid shit. And the worst part is that they're already so corrupt. All the girls are whores and sluts, and all the boys are pricks who call eachother faggot and other racial slurs (I'm aware that faggot isnt a racial slur but you get the point)
AND THEYRE FUCKING DUMB SHIT.
Obviously if you run into me or my passive freshman, I'm going to push you. So don't get mad. Just walk away and accept your mistake okay?
Also,
It's like 50 degrees there. So don't wear a mini-skirt that shows your ass and then complain its cold. Just dont. Because I'll push you too.

It was raining earlier, and now there is this drip drip sound that sounds like its coming from right above my bed in the attic. Which it probably is.
Fucking faulty roof.

Fuck. I hate gushing. I don't think that I get all moody and stuff, but then every once in a while I'll do something and realize it. Like, I told jacob i loved him and then a minute later he asked if i loved him, and i said "ugh. yes i just said so" and now I feel bad....
Ummm
Sorry?

Are you allowed to apologize via blog?
Idk.


Goodnight.
My conscience is all fucked up now.
I really am sorry.

Lock the door to your room...

I'm thinking about how I should be sleeping now, but instead I'm sitting and writing pointless stuff. I don't really have that much to say, except that I wanna go to venice this weekend, and I want to take Jackson with me since he says he hates it there, and that he hates homeless people. I know homeless people are a little scary SOMETIMES, but not like scary enough that you need to be deathly afraid of them. I mean, come on, theyre homeless. They can't be in that good of shape. Some of them don't eat much, and they've got all their stuff theyre not going to abandon, so theyre not going to chase you...
Unless theyre an active and fit hobo. In which case Jackson is screwed.

Anyway.

I love you guys.

And I've decided that I'm not quite ready to grow up just yet.

I found out the other day that I went to a pyschologist when I was going into preschool, and I went to be analized to see if I was ready for preschool. He said that I was academically ready, but I was at the lowest of the social level to be recomended to go to preschool. Which is why I still act like a little kid. So what if I had waited a year? Would I be even smarter and would I be in AP's and Honors classes? Would I be going to a 4 year instead of a JC first?

Also with that, the pyschologist said that he's got this theory that babies who are post-term (late babies) get a buildup of testosterone and that makes them have more male-ish traits. So then he said that I tend to learn like guys do. And why I'm still a tomboy. Because I was two weeks overdue. But that's just his theory...

Oh well.

Can't change it now.

More stuff

Two things today:

a) I got spotlight for Assassins with Jackson, my freshman. We're gonna rock it. So, when you come see it, look for us. We're going to be awesome, us Spot-buddies.

b) I don't cry about things. So then why today did I? For no reason. I was in photography and then Mr. Gilman handed me keys to unlock the blackoutroom door and said jokingly "lets get it right today" because yesterday i couldnt get the door opened. And
i dunno. 242 days without crying. And then.
bam
for no reason.

God. I feel fucking stupid.

Updates...

I Love:

Jacob
and
Justen

because they read this....
(along with some other people apparently)


I only have one thing to say:
I wish you people wouldn't drink. Serioulsy. Even when I'm not around. It really pisses me off for some reason. Don't be a hypocrite and not do it around me, but then casually do it when I'm gone. Fuck. I hate it. Fuck you shitty bitches.



<3

Orthodontist

Today I was at the orthodontist, and I hate it there, and I was waiting to be called in, and there was this boy who was playing with duplos, and singing the spongebob theme song, and then his mom said something, and he turned to her and said, "third grade is stressful."
omg. if he thinks third grade is stressful....

Hurry up and ...

I really want to know what is in the box Justen gave me.
It's really bothering me.

I'm kidding.
I <3 u J-ten.
Don't die just yet.

Fucking Mothers. (No, not milfs)

Chemistry is busting my nonexistant balls. Seriously. They're nonexistant. Mr. Morrow is all about busy work and its driving me fucking nuts. There's no need to have me do 80 problems on significant figures. We're not that stupid. And need I remind you that I PASSED first semester. So i know this shit.

And government is so fucking boring. But I drew this awesome picture of Crime cause I like that sentence "to remember or to forget" and it looks pretty good even though it doesnt look like Crime cause I've only seen the picture once. Not the point though.

I'm making two shirts. One for the Against Me! show on thursday and one for the Fake Problems show on Saturday. One's an against me shirt and ones a fake problem shirt. But I hate wearing a band shirt to the band's show; its tacky, everyone already knows you love them, cause thats why youre there. So I'm going to wear the fake problems one to the against me show and vice versa. It's pretty cool. The Against me shirt I got the stencil from someone else and changed it a bit, but it's tom and the mic chord spells Joy. It could have spelled anything, but Joy was good so i left it at that. The fake problems one... im not so sure about. I was thinking about doing the lettering of the name from the How Far Our Bodies Go album, you know, how its all scratchy and whatnot. It looks like the picture. Anyway, I was thinkng of doing that, and then maybe the skelletons from Spurs on the back of the shirt. Or mayb ethe other way around. I dont know. ANd who really cares right?

Fuck.
My mom thinks the Against Me one looks like "he's smoking a pipe." Tom is not fucking smoking a pipe. It's a fucking mic. Jesus FUCKING CHRIST. I need to change the word if it at least looks like a pipe. Cause it cant look like a pipe vaguely and say joy. It's just bad.
GAH.
Maybe Ill just change it to against me!
FUCK.
FUCK.
Fuck.
I guess I'll do it again then.

Stupid people. Why cant they just know my intentions?

Never say never.

Never give up. Never give in. Never give out.

Progress, not perfection.

I seriously can't keep doing this.

Every time Jacob sleeps over, we end up getting about 4 or 5 hours of sleep, which I can do. That's okay. But its times like last night, where we just don't sleep that I have trouble with the next day.

My gauges came in the mail! 10ga is kinda small, but I guess I'll work from there.

Frick.

Today I was writing a paper and I wrote the word democracy in it, but I accidentally typed Democrazy. And I've read Freud, and I'm pretty sure that was a Freudian slip. Cause I honestly do think that our democracy is a little crazy.

Freud would have been proud.

Democrazy...

A Hole New Me

I bought 2 dresses today. I really don't know why, since I'll probably never wear them to school. (Or who knows? I suprised myself once by buying them, and I might just do it again by wearing them.) I'm also wearing tights. And one of the dresses. It's very unlike me. I'm almost a little creeped out.

Speaking of new things:

NEW TO COME! TO A Kristine Michelle Baeseman-Fredericks NEAR YOU!

Don't interpret that "to come" part, as I know some of you are very well doing.
I'm buying gauges. I'm thinking of only going to a 6g, but I saw some really pretty 2g's that I might just have to have. So it all depends. I know that the 2g is the "point of no return" for some people, or thats where the line starts, because I've also heard of people with 000's that have gone back to an 18g. I don't know. I guess it all depends upon when my parents start noticing. (They tend not to notice things like that. They're very observant.)

This week! Exciting stuff. Well, not this week, but next week, or um..actually 2 weeks. I'm going to see Against Me! and Fake Problems, which is part of the reason I want to start gauging NOW. Even though I know I won't get above a 16g by then. It's a start. But I digress. I'm excited because now that I have short hair, I can mosh a lot easier, without making sure my hair isnt going to get ripped out. Not that I ever had much of an affinity for my hair when it was long.

(Ps, the title is a play on words, but not in a perverted way. Its cause of the gauges... oh never mind. )

Their Society's Based On America

How can women wear pants
but men must wear dresses?
Its just fabric. its just design.
where is the line between
new fashion and cross dressing?
is there diffrence in men and women?
its just flesh. its just design.

Anxiety, Anxiety...

School fucking sucks. I've been listening to this song a lot: (you should too)

Against Me! - Borne On The FM Waves of The Heart

No, its not what we meant to say.
We don’t really love each other.
What happens when the summer’s over?
How long before distance becomes a chore?
Im approaching with great, great trepidation.
I hope you’ll understand.

Before you speak think about what your trying to say.
Who else is there to blame for miscommunication?
Your getting caught up in the excitement.
You making promises you can’t keep.
You need to leave all your options open.

Too much momentum.
This room feels like its going to explode.
Too many angles.
Too many factors to cover.
Waiting for signal.
Your searching for network.
You have to fight to stay in control of the situation.

Anxiety, Anxiety you give me no mercy.
Grind my teeth smoothe and flat in my sleep.
We took some pills to calm us down.
Then we needed help to come back up.
Just trying to stay in control of the situation.

Too much momentum.
This room feels like its going to explode.
Too many angles.
Too many factors to cover.
Waiting for signal.
Your searching for network.
You have to fight to stay in control of the situation.
They fall apart so easily.

Too much momentum.
This room feels like its going to expolde.
Too many angles.
Too many factors to cover.
Waiting for signal.
Your searching for network.
You have to fight to stay in control.
You have to fight to stay in control.
No, you don’t have to fight to stay in control of the situation.

Oh! How the mighty have fallen...

I can forgive the $30 hoodies. I can forgive the $30 shows. I can forgive the "sell-out" of New Wave. I can forgive a lot, but the fact of the matter is, Against Me!, you let them censor you. And I will never forgive that.

I've decided that most of the freshmen this year are good. Either that or I just haven't met the bad ones.

We pulled up a tree today. :(
And we're going to have to uproot another soon. The one in the front yard. It's cause its supposedly going to be a hundred feet tall in 5 years. It's like from Africa or something. Its got nasty thorns on it that are like 3 inches. No joke. I was trimming this tree yesterday and the gloves I had on were covered in blood spots. It was gross and kinda cool too.

I've been looking for new little bands to listen to and support with my love. And I can't find any that I totally love as much as Against Me! and Fake Problems. I can find some good ones, but its just not the same you know? A Kiss Could Be Deadly is close though. But Against Me! and Fake Problems are awesome. I <3 them.

I'm gonna rock y'all

Today was better than yesterday. I didn't have to change classes or anything.

I have to recite the preamble:
(here's my practice from memory from 8th grade)

We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the comon defense, promote the general welfare and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this constitution of the united states of america

damn bitches.
I'm so gonna rock this.

And i have a chem test tomorrow.
Well
Sb = Antimony
and
Sn = Tin.

what now bitches??
what now??????

First day of last year of school today.

Uber uneventful.

I got a haircut yesterday, but words and pictures don't do it justice. You have to touch it to believe it.

Last night I listened to "Borne on the FM waves of the heart" and it almost made me cry.

Those of you who know the song might know why.

How Pathetic.

School starts wednesday.

How unexciting.

I'm going to be a big senior this year. Three years went by fast. I remember in 8th grade listening to Vitamin C's Graduation Song thinking that this is it, and that's the end of everything, and from here on out we're all going to be so different and heading in different directions.

I just so happened to have stumbled upon it again.

It's just not a happy song. I don't care how uplifting its supposed to be, its just got too many "if's" and "can?" 's. It's too open ended.

MY SUPER AWESOME DAY IN SANFRAN SANS PARENTS

Today my parents let me go to the crazy windy city of SAN FRANCISCO!!!! unatended. They went to Napa Valley to drink some wine and stuff for a while. They left at like 9ish, and so I took a shower and blowed my hair dry and then flatter-ironed it. Then it was nearly 9:30 so I ran down to the lobby to catch the bus to the airport.

See what goes on, is the hotel has a free bus to the airport, and the airport has a bart station, so I just take the bus to the bart to the sanfran right? Easy. Maybe...

Well, I only know how to get to the bart from the bus pick-up, but I got dropped off at the domestic flight place, and the bart is in the international terminal. But its no big deal, they have a train that goes through the airport from terminal to terminal, so I’ll just take that. Isn’t that nice??

If only I was that smart. But I got on the wrong little train thing. So I was riding it around and around for a half hour before I realized that I was going in circles. So I got on the RIGHT train and found the bart place, but then I had to buy a ticket. And uh... I didn’t know where I was going.

It’s five fifteen to ride from SFO to Montgomery station. And there’s like 8 million stops from there until there. And there was this old white lady who kind of made me laugh (a little) because she kept closing her eyes and putting her fingers in her ears when it was loud, but when I did it, she just glared at me.

So then I got there, and the station let out in this mall called the Westfield Mall, and they have circular staircases. They’re pretty cool, but not all that circular. Just somewhat circular.

Anyway, so then I started walking towards Union Square, cause thats where I said I’d be probably. But first I went to Virgin Megastore and looked at all the music and videos. But that was boring so I left.

Then I was at Union Square, but it was boring too so I started walking north. Then I saw this store called Kar’ikter and the name intrigued me, so I went in, and it was full of frenchies and brits! See, it was cause the store was full of frenchie and brit stuff like Asterix and Le Petit Prince. Actually, those are both french things. I don’t know why all the brits were in there.

But Asterix and Le Petit Prince can only hold my attention for so long, so I started walking north again to Chinatown, and theres this big long tunnel to get to it, and so I was walking it and someone had graffiti’d on the side “Stop the war now” and I meant to take a picture but I didn’t.

Then I was walking through Chinatown. It’s pretty chinese. There’s a billion foods I don’t know and there was these dead fish and some fish that everyone thought was dead

and oh my god i’m watching Fresh Prince and oprah was on it. wow the real oprah. crazy.

Sorry. Anyway, so there was this fish that when I walked by, it started flipping around and trying to swim and stuff, except it was going to die soon, but it didn’t know it yet, and people were laughing at it. Poor fish. Silly asians.

So then I got to the end of the chinatown, and I thought that I was fairly close to Fisherman’s Wharf. So guess what, I walked. It’s 12 blocks roughly. And uh, I didn’t know that until I looked at the map.

Then I went to Ghirardelli and got some chocolate to eat, but I didn’t eat it right then. Instead I got a ticket and went on the cable cars and met these old people and took their picture for them, and I wished that one day I’m old and riding cable cars and can get some kid to take a picture of me and my old man.

There were also some german people on there. So I took that all the way back to Market street. And uh.... then i was bored again, so I went back to Union Square, but that was boring too.

But I saw the Nike place, so I went in there, and it was crazy cool!!!!! It’s like 5 floors of crazy Nikeness. the walkways are cool. The people are cool. The lights are cool.

So I left.

Then I went back to chinatown and walked around some more. I bought some cool playing cards, and every card has a different picture of Mao on it. They’re awesome. I also bought this cool notebook thats made of real paper thats like hand made and leaves.

Then I wanted some Ghirardelli ice cream so I waited for the trolley, but it was taking its sweet time about getting there, so I went and bought some lemonade, but it tasted a little wierd. Too bad I was really thirsty, cause I drank it anyway.

Then the cable car was there, and there was this really adorable french guy. And I was going to say something french, but I couldn’t recall anything good to say, and they got off at the next stop, so I just sat down and waited untill....

The cable car stopped. And it didn’t start again. Only then did I realize that I had taken the wrong one all the way to the end. Silly me. So I got back on the train and sat there for twenty minutes before it started going the other direction.

Eventually I got going in the right direction and ended up at the Ghirardelli place again. Except this time I did it right and got a Very Berry Sundae. It was uber delicious, and I needed to start going home soon, so I thought I’d wait in line while eating it. But.... the line was really long and so I called my parents to see if they’d come pick me up, but they didn’t want to.

So I thought I was screwed, but then I remembered that the card I bought earlier allowed me to go on the other MUNI things. So I walked two blocks and got on a trolley thing and went to Market Street. But while I was on there, there was this guy who was so fit the perfect stereotype of gayness. And he was talking on the phone about some german thing he was going to that night.

But I was tired, so I got off and got on the BART to go back to the airport. It was relatively uneventful until I got to Daly City, and the train stopped, and everyone got off. So I sat there, waiting for it to start again, but this lady came up and told me that I needed to switch trains, so I got up but right as I got to the door, it closed.

And it stayed closed. I kicked the door a little. It stayed closed. I looked up and down the train and nobody was on it.
It stayed closed for 16 minutes.
Eventually I got back to the hotel of normal people.
There’s a bunch of people who you don’t usually find at an Embassy Suites in the lobby. People with tattoos and piercings galore.

But I didn’t care. It was happy hour and I wanted my damn shirley temple (like I get every day. Usually two of them.) So I was waiting in line, and there was a guy there with tattoos in line, and so I asked him what was going on. He said there was a tattoo convention nearby and a bunch of them were staying here. So he called his friend over and this guy was so crazy cool. (Cool in a way that was crazy, not that I’d ever do this cool yet crazy thing.)

This guy had a star on his forehead. Actually not on it, but in it. It was 3D. It was a star in his forehead, and it made a star shape bump on his head. It was so strange. Yet... so cool. I don’t know. He also had a naked lady tattoo on his arm, and had two bumps where the boobs were so the tattoo had 3D boobs.

My dad walked by him later, and said he was disgusted.

UHG
PARENTS.

I'm a scientific american too!

Today I bought this book called "The World Without Us" by Alan Weisman. It's about what would happen if all the humans just dissapeared one day. Here's the video for it. I know its kind of corny, the guy and all, but just go with it. It's still really cool.



Also, I'm leaving tomorrow for San Francisco, a city I consider to be just about perfect. (It lacks subways.) I haven't been to New York yet, so I'm thinking it might be perfect. But until then, I settle (and love) San Francisco. So look for pictures and blogs the next few days. I'm sure there'll be good stories, since my parents are letting me roam the city myself.

That's all for now. I have to pack and stuff you know?

Hear ye Hear ye....

As you may or may not know, this year I will be attempting to pass chemistry yet again. Third times the charm right? RIGHT!

Jacob is also taking chemistry. But he's just a wee lad, and its his first time. He's a chemistry virgin.

So we came up with a little bet.

He was giving me crap about my lack of chem skils, and I said I could beat him at it.

Based on each semester:

FIRST SEMESTER!!!!
If he wins (he wont) then I have to wear a shirt of his choosing to school.
When I win, then we never have to watch a movie that he's already seen ever again. Thats right, NEVER.

SECOND SEMESTER!!!
If he wins (he wont again) then when he says I love you, I'm not allowed to say I love you more.
When I win, (i win anyway since i get to graduate) (INSERT PUNISHMENT HERE)

Anyone got any good ideas for me??????

The Aquabats show of Awesomeness!!!!

I went to the Music Box at the Henry Fonda Theater on friday and saw The Aquabats, The Phenomenauts, MC Lars and A Kiss Could Be Deadly. It was a lot of fun, but basically because I just like loud music and entertainment.

The first band to play was a little band called A Kiss Could Be Deadly. They totally rocked the house. The lead singer knew just how to open a show; full of energy and fun. Not often do I see a full mosh pit for an opening act. I enjoyed them so much that I went and bought their cd, and for 2 dollars, it would be criminal not to. They even gave me some of their guitar picks, which were awesome because they were skull shaped.

The next band up was an MC by the name of MC Lars. Before he went on he was working the merch booth and we stopped and talked to him. His shirts were really funny cause they said “Hot Topic is not punk rock.” He was a nice guy and his lyrics were really clever. Although I thought that he didn’t really fit in with the kind of music that was playing that night, the crowd responded reasonably well.

However, you could definitely tell that a good part of the crowd was there for the Phenomenauts. They’re a psychobilly band from the future, and they definatly got the crowd pumped. They put everything into dressing the part, as they all have matching jumpsuits. They even have their own futuristic microphones. I even headed for the mosh pit at this point. It’s nuts though, because a lot of the guys are three and four times my size. At least they help you up if you can’t hold your own and stay on your feet.

But then the Aquabats came on, and I’ve never seen such love for a group. They have a hand gesture that is the shape of an aquabat, and as soon as the curtains go up, everyone in the pit makes that gesture. It’s pretty intense. Cause theres a lot of them, you know? So it's like cultish.

There was a part where there was a bad guy on stage and he was too strong for the aquabats, so the singer cries out, "he's too powerful! if only we had hundreds of multicolored balls!" and then from the balcony comes millions of plastic playplace balls and then everyone is throwing them at the bad guys. It's fun.

The mosh pit was weird though, because it wasn't straight mosh and it wasn't straight skank, it was a strange mix of both. Don't get me wrong, it was still cool, but it was hard to follow at times.

It was fun.
I can't wait till the next show.... Sept 27th?
Yes.

Good Morning?

It's still moring I guess.
Yesterday was shit.
I drank way too much congar, then stayed up way too late thinking about way too many things. Now certain people are afraid I'm going to off myself or something I guess.

Right now is better though, since theres a reggae band playing a few doors down, and I can hear it and it's kinda cool. I also have one of the best foods on the world: Lemon Sorbet. seriously its heaven. I also am having burgers tonite (my kind of burgers, so that ought to be delicious) and I really do like them.

Last yesterday I was going to Hawaii, then not hawaii, then chicago, then not chicago, and now it seems i'm going to san francisco. I love san francisco! And my parents are going to leave me for a day while they go wine drinking. So guess where I'll be headed?

Im wearing a dress.

It's nice...?
I suppose.